5 Ways to Dress Better in 2016

In the interest of doing one's part to not further f—k up the environment but also because you probably already have more clothes than anybody really needs in a lifetime, let us resolve to only buy things 1) after we've thought of at least five ways to wear them and 2) if they truly give us joy.

By being ultra selective with your shopping, you'll get to know the pieces you do own better—fewer options makes remembering everything easier, which in turn cuts down on regret à la "I'm half a block away from the office, but I kind of want to go home because I realized that other top would have made my outfit that much better." Bonus: You know how you come up with the best ideas when you've under-packed for a trip? Get used to being that creative…FOREVER. ::pyrotechnics display::

The experts who prescribe one type of skirt BUT NEVER ANOTHER TYPE OF SKIRT for apple/pear/papaya/tangelo shapes mean well, but they don't know you like you do. There are exceptions to every rule, first of all, and there's much more to fashion than looking thinner or more proportional. (Like feeling like Brienne of Tarth in both height and skewering-your-enemies ability, for example.)

It always comes back to this: Wear whatever you want, unless you can wear Dries van Noten exclusively—then wear that.

Très specific, I know, but for good reason: Red lipstick pairs so well with clothes that some of us, including plenty of celebrities, might have come to rely on it too heavily. Why not try a chalky pink? Precision eye-lining? A Céline-like smear of blue cream shadow? Half the fun of getting dressed is in the styling, so don't half-ass it when you're so close to the finish line.   

To sidewalk lechers, former grade-school hall monitors, and random strangers who just don't *get* that when you comment on a girl's bell sleeves, it becomes personal: "Blow us 👌." As you get dressed sometimes, you might consider how your fellow commuters or your mom or the other patrons at a particular bar might react to your outfit, but just push that thought right out of your mind and wear whatever makes you happy, whether that's a lamé Liberace shirt or a paillette micro-mini.

It's been one long freakout over Gucci since Alessandro Michele took the wheel because dude's unapologetic about liking glitter and shine and animal appliqués and wearing all those things together—with aviator glasses plus your grandma's Sunday handbag. This kind of dressing is about showing off, which, frankly, none of us do enough. Instead of wasting your energy on being Instagram perfect (a euphemism for "everything-is-white-on-white-on-dark-white blah"), really go for it. You don't lose anything by trying stuff on, and in the worst-case scenario, you end up looking like the Poot Lovato version of Iris Apfel. Which is still better than looking boring. 

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