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    1. Sex and Love

    The Best Non-Phallic Sex Toys

    Pleasure and penetration don’t always go hand-in-hand.

    Gabrielle Ulubay#039;s avatar
    By Gabrielle Ulubay
    Published 21 May 2024 In Buying Guides

    When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Here’s how it works.

    collage of a woman, a Bloomi sex toy, and a silhouette of two people about to kiss
    (Image credit: Jonelle Afurong)
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    When you think of the best sex toys or best vibrators, you may initially picture a phallic object. There's an antiquated assumption that sex toys for women should mimic (or at least resemble) a penis, but the truth is that the world of pleasure extends far beyond the confines of heteronormativity. Non-phallic sex toys are great for anyone looking to expand their sexual repertoire or simply mix things up, and they’re crucial for those who prefer not to have anything resembling a phallus in their bed.

    “Non-phallic sex toys decenter the penis, allowing a more comfortable, pleasurable experience for those who may not be attracted to men or a penis,” says Shamyra Howard, Sexologist, LCSW.

    She adds that they’re also powerful tools for those who have experienced trauma, explaining, “Non-phallic sex toys allow survivors of sexual assault to reclaim their bodies, sexuality, and sex life. Many survivors who were violated by a person with a penis want to explore sexuality while de-centering the penis. Non-phallic sex toys provide users with another chance at safe, no-pressure sexual exploration.”

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    Finally, these sex toys transcend the limits of a phallic object, allowing users to explore pleasure beyond penetration. Non-phallic sex toys come in a variety of different shapes and sizes, allowing users to better access areas like the clitoris and rectum, as well as erogenous zones all over the body. Howard agrees, “Non-phallic sex toys are often multi-functional and can provide pleasurable stimulation to other erogenous zones such as the clitoris, nipples, inner things, neck, breasts, knees, and labia.”

    • Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Suction: Womanizer Next Clitoral Suction Stimulator
    • Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Beginners: Dame Fin
    • Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Partner Play: Dame Eva
    • Best Wearable Non-Phallic Sex Toy: Vesper Vibrator Necklace
    • Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy Overall: Njoy Pure Wand Stainless Steel Dildo

    Womanizer Next Clitoral Suction Stimulator

    Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Suction
    Womanizer Next Clitoral Suction Stimulator
    $219 AT LOVEHONEY

    "The Womanizer Next is a non-phallic sex toy for the multi-orgasm seeker," says Howard. "This sex toy provides pleasure air that mimics oral sensations on the clitoris. It is another multi-function sex toy that also feels good on the nipples."

    Pros: Expert-approved; 14 intensity levels and three levels of depth; quiet; waterproof; customizable suction cups

    Cons: Expensive

    Fin

    Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Beginners
    Dame Fin
    $65 AT DAME

    This vibrator, which comes in two chic colors, is made to fasten comfortably onto the user's finger so that stimulating the clitoris can be more intuitive and intimate. Hundreds of reviewers love it for its accessibility (it doesn't strain or hurt your wrist) and for how helpful it is for beginners to sex toys and to clitoral stimulation in general.

    Pros: Editor-approved; accessible; easy to use; lightweight; three intensity levels; water-resistant; comfortable; woman and BIPOC-owned brand

    Cons: Not quiet

    Vesper Vibrator Necklace

    Best Wearable Non-Phallic Sex Toy
    Vesper Vibrator Necklace
    $69 AT NORDSTROM

    I've written an entire essay about how much I love this necklace. This vibrator was made for the jewelry lover or for the feminist who loves wearing their sexuality on their sleeve. In addition to being a chic gold necklace (it truly matches with everything), it's a fully functioning vibrator with surprisingly powerful vibrations. Reviewers love it for both the way it looks and the way it feels, making it the perfect marriage of form and function.

    Pros: Editor-approved; subtle; stylish; has a travel lock; comes in three finishes

    Cons: Some reviewers with it had more vibration patterns/speeds

    Eva

    Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Partner Play
    Dame Eva
    $140 AT DAME

    I've extolled the virtues of this toy before, and I'll do it again: The Eva is the perfect hands-free toy for both partnered and solo play. It gently clips onto the clitoris so you can enjoy external stimulation while focusing your hands (or your partner's) elsewhere. It has three intensity levels and a whopping four-hour battery life, so you can keep it running throughout your entire session without worrying about it leaving you hanging.

    Pros: Editor-approved; hands-free; three levels of intensity; long battery life; comes in a convenient charging case; woman and BIPOC-owned brand

    Cons: Made from silicone, so not compatible with silicone lubes

    Njoy Pure Wand Stainless Steel Dildo

    Best Versatile Non-Phallic Sex Toy
    Njoy Pure Wand Stainless Steel Dildo
    $150 AT LOVEHONEY

    I will always stand by this luxurious sex toy because of its versatility. Because it's made from stainless steel, it's compatible with all types of lube. Because of its curved shape, it's also safe for vaginal and anal penetration, and it includes both a beginner-friendly thin end and an expert-level girthier end. Finally, this toy may not vibrate, but it boasts hundreds of rave reviews attesting to its effectiveness.

    Pros: Editor-approved; can be cooled or heated for temperature play; suitable for all experience levels; good for anal and vaginal penetration; easy to clean

    Cons: Doesn't vibrate

    Also Recommended

    We-Vibe Touch X Rechargeable Clitoral Vibrator

    Best Ergonomic Non-Phallic Sex Toy
    We-Vibe Touch X Rechargeable Clitoral Vibrator
    $99 AT LOVEHONEY

    "The We-Vibe Touch X is a non-phallic sex toy that can fit into the palm of your hand," says Howard. "It’s a multi-function sex toy that provides intense but gentle vibrations that stimulate and titillate various body parts such as the labia, clitoris, and inner thigh." Users agree that it's ergonomic, making it easy to explore different erogenous zones without missing a beat.

    Pros: Expert-approved; comes in two colors; seven vibration modes and eight levels of intensity; ergonomic; quiet

    Cons: Some users found that the battery life (120 minutes) wasn't long enough; because it's made of silicone, it's not compatible with silicone-based lubes

    Plusone Rose Arouser Vibrator

    Best Decorative Non-Phallic Sex Toy
    Plusone Rose Arouser Vibrator
    SHOP NOW

    Thanks to TikTok, the rose clitoral vibrator has become one of the most well-known non-phallic sex toys on the planet. Its beautiful floral shape allows users to store it out in the open, but this toy is more than just decorative—according to thousands of reviews, it packs a punch. With 10 pulsating settings and an effect that mimics the feeling of oral sex, it's more than earned its five-star reputation.

    Pros: Decorative; waterproof; easy to clean; multiple vibration settings; popular

    Cons: Because it's made of silicone, it's not compatible with silicone-based lubes

    Lelo Dot

    Best Pinpoint Non-Phallic Sex Toy
    Lelo Dot
    $179 AT REVOLVE

    For those of us who know the exact spot that the vibrator needs to hit, this vibrator is a perfect choice. Its precision tip is among the most narrow on the market, and it's made with multiple orgasms in mind. The soft, silicone toy also features a comfortable handle that allows you or a partner to maneuver it easily.

    Pros: Ergonomic; made for precision; flexible

    Cons: Because it's made of silicone, it's not compatible with silicone-based lubes

    Vibe

    Best Award-Winning Non-Phallic Sex Toy
    Maude Vibe
    $49 AT MAUDE

    This vibrator is so beautiful that it was featured in the Museum of Modern Art's Design Store and received a Best in Show award from The Strategist. With its sleek cone shape that fits comfortably in the palm of your hand, it has a precision tip that's perfect for targeted stimulation to the clitoris or to other erogenous zones. Water-resistant, it has three unique speeds and a 1.5 hour battery life.

    Pros: Award-winning; woman and BIPOC-owned brand; latex-free; three speeds; water-resistant

    Cons: Shorter battery life than some competitors

    Basics Anal Prober 7 Inch

    Best Anal Non-Phallic Sex Toy
    Lovehoney Basics Anal Prober 7 Inch
    $13 AT LOVEHONEY

    This anal prober is made from premium, flexible jelly-like material that's perfect for beginners. Its anal beads also increase subtly in size, making it easy to either tease a partner (or yourself) or to slowly increase your comfort level with anal play.

    Pros: Affordable; safe for anal penetration; suitable for temperature play

    Cons: Made from plastic, so not suitable for use with silicone lube

    Womanizer Duo 2 Rechargeable Silicone G-Spot and Clitoral Stimulator

    Womanizer Duo 2 Rechargeable Silicone G-Spot and Clitoral Stimulator
    $219 AT LOVEHONEY

    Howard also recommends this Womanizer toy, calling it "a non-phallic sex toy for those who want to experience some form of penetration." This is perfect for those who know they enjoy penetrative sex but aren't sexually attracted to penises or don't want to use a toy that looks like one. She continues, "This sex toy stimulates that clitoris and provides simultaneous g-spot stimulation. It's a two-in-one sex toy that brings double the pleasure and double the fun."

    Pros: Expert-approved; allows users to experience penetration without the use of a phallus; comes in five colors; 14 levels of intensity and 10 vibration patterns; waterproof

    Cons: Expensive; some users wish it was quieter

    small, strawberry-shaped sex toy in the palm of someone#039;s hand

    Best Subtle Non-Phallic Vibrator
    Emojibator Strawberry Emojibator
    $79 AT EMOJIBATOR

    Emojibator specializes in making subtle sex toys that don't look like traditional vibrators. This is both to make vibrators easier to store out in the open and to make them more accessible and beginner-friendly. This strawberry-shaped, travel-friendly bullet vibrator is a perfect example of that. Plus, it has eight vibration settings and eight suction patterns, making it ideal for novices and experts alike.

    Pros: Subtle; eight vibration patterns and eight suction modes; great for all experience levels; cute; great for travel; waterproof

    Cons: Made from silicone, so not suitable for use with silicone lube

    gray sex toy

    Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Grinding
    $125 AT BABELAND

    Some people prefer indirect clitoral stimulation from actions like grinding, spurring retailers to create toys for just that. This gadget is not designed not only for maximum friction, but it's also equipped with a motor that delivers up to seven different vibration patterns. Finally, it's also designed to fit perfectly between two bodies during partnered play and to stimulate testicles.

    Pros: Made with all anatomies and preferences in mind; ideal for solo or partnered play; works for grinding; vibrates; comes in two colors

    Cons: One user disliked that it glows in the dark

    Meet the Expert

    Shamyra Howard
    Shamyra Howard
    Social Links Navigation
    Sexologist, LCSW

    Shamyra Howard is an international award-winning sexologist, licensed clinical social worker, and AASECT certified sex therapist committed to helping people improve their relationship and intimate lives. She is also the founder of On the Green Couch, where she helps people overcome sexual obstacles, and has authored two books.

    Marie Claire Newsletter

    Celebrity news, beauty, fashion advice, and fascinating features, delivered straight to your inbox!

    By submitting your information you agree to the Terms Conditions and Privacy Policy and are aged 16 or over.
    Gabrielle Ulubay
    Gabrielle Ulubay
    Social Links Navigation
    Former Beauty Writer

    Gabrielle Ulubay is a Former Beauty Writer at Marie Claire. She has also written about sexual wellness, politics, culture, and fashion at Marie Claire and at publications including The New York Times, HuffPost Personal, Bustle, Alma, Muskrat Magazine, O'Bheal, and elsewhere. Her personal essay in The New York Times' Modern Love column kickstarted her professional writing career in 2018, and that piece has since been printed in the 2019 revised edition of the Modern Love book. Having studied history, international relations, and film, she has made films on politics and gender equity in addition to writing about cinema for Film Ireland, University College Cork, and on her personal blog, gabrielleulubay.medium.com.

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